Genre Clues

When I dozed off on the couch, snuggled up to the Handsome Man, we were watching tv on Hulu.

When I woke up, hours later, Handsome was watching the end of some French film on Netflix. Initially, I had a hard time even understanding what genre of film it was. Maybe that shouldn’t have been difficult: there was a hip-hop score with driving beats; a gritty urban environment; young, hard-bodied men engaged in close physical combat. But I had just awoken from a sound-sleeping nap, so my perceptions in general were fuzzy. Plus the characters were speaking French, and that sort of threw everything off. I wondered if this was the thrilling climax to a thoughtful, intellectual film. I wondered it was an innovative, European, street-based version of Ultimate Fighting Championship. I wondered if it was some kind of soft core violent gay porn.

Handsome kept his eyes on the subtitles while he gave me a quick summary of the story to date. I watched for a while, and struggled to catch up:

Me: ...So that’s the hero’s sister?

Handsome: Yeah.

Me: And the hero and his friend have just rescued her from being held hostage?

Handsome: Yeah.

(silence, watching the screen)

Me: For how long was she held hostage?

Handsome: Like five years.

(silence, watching the screen)

Me: Rape-y hostage?

Handsome: That’s implied.

Me: How long ago did they rescue her?

Handsome: Like two hours.

(silence, watching the screen)

Me: ...She’s awfully smiley for someone who was just rescued from five years of rape-y hostage two hours ago...

Handsome: ...That’s true.

(silence, watching the screen)

Me: ...And now she’s tongue-kissing the hero’s friend?

Handsome: Yeah.

Me: So it’s an action movie.

Handsome: Basically.